It is time for another division rivalry to pop the clutch drop and be off faster than an Kim Kardashian marriage.  Just like Sean Avery returning to the New York Rangers, you can’t keep a division mate out of the building for long. It’s time to give Peggy at USA Prime Credit a call, move that port-a-potty to right in front of the flat screen and get your division guzzle on.


Take One Drink:

Whenever the word rival(s) is used.

One team compliments the other during an interview.

Head shots are mentioned.

Chris Kelly having been a member of the Senators is mentioned.

“D to D pass” is used

The work expectations and performance are used in the same sentence.

Take Two Drinks:

If Chris Neil scores.

If the Bruins score on the power play.

The all time record between the teams is mentioned.

If at any point Jared Cowen is compared to Zdeno Chara.

The word “rebuild” is applied to the Senators.

You aren’t sure if the Bruins were caught in a line change or Julien has just changed the lines again.

Take Three Drinks:

If there is a fight where the combined salary is more than four million dollars.

Jason Spezza being over a point per game is mentioned.

Erik Karlsson is mentioned as leading the league in scoring for defensemen.

Tim Thomas’s stats against the Senators are mentioned.

Anyone uses the phrase “Stanley Cup Hangover”

Take Four Drinks:

Each time the standings are shown or mentioned:  For Bruins fans this is to ease the pain, for Senators fans this is to steady the excitement.

If Zdeno Chara is mentioned as having been a Senator or a key part of their fall from grace when he left.

If any player not on either team is mentioned and it wasn’t because of an injury they caused to one of the Senators or Bruins, such as: Kessel, Neal, Crosby, Ovechkin, Hall, Eberle, Nugent-Hopkins, or Avery.

The game is ruined by the post overtime skills competition.

More than three rookies are mentioned in one sentence.

Any player scores a hat trick.

Skip a drink if:

Someone mentions Battle of the Blades and you think for even a second it might be worth seeing.

You feel the urge to explain icing to a friend who knows nothing about hockey for the third or greater time.

You think you’re seeing the best officiating of the year.

About Puck Sage

Hockey fan, Bruins fan, and fan of players who leave it all on the ice like: Bergeron, Toews, Stuart, Girardi, Doan, Brown, Seabrook, Weber, Ovechkin, Iginla, Sobotka, and more. Real jobs have been in sales, willing to be paid to cover hockey. I can out chirp your whole fanbase.

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